“maybe when the chance happens again.” he said that! and it worries her how much he was contemplating such things but sure, she understands. she had her own curiosity fed and if he wanted to explore, there was no taking away that kind of indulgence.

thoughts dissipate into excitement, stricken by panic at the same time, when the call she had been waiting for all night finally comes. she hadn’t been this nervous before talking to her parents but she bursts into a string of laughter once she’s greeted by at least four minutes of a shaky camera with her mother fixing the angle and in the background was their voices, fussing over how it should be done. this wasn’t the first time with a camera but it certainly had been a while. 

she wasn’t proud of that. she wanted to call them often if she could but she never knew what to say to them whenever she did and the last time she did, she was being her typical spoiled self asking to cover for expenses which was given undoubted.

it’s something to be grateful but a part of her was hoping there were questions. she wanted to tell them why, what for, who the gift would be for. that way, it’ll be easier to share what she had been meaning to.

awkward silences. the main component of their calls.

it’s mother’s day, so of course she greets her lovely mother that which was accepted with awe in the form of an exclamation, followed by the endearing call for her. daughter. she liked hearing it in her voice. she misses it. she just didn’t know how to admit it and express it in front of them very much, not unless it’s initiated on the other end. she asks them, “how did you spend today?” and the most she’d spoken of was work and only a minute’s worth mentioning what they’d done to celebrate the holiday. there was laughter in the background regardless and it warms her heart.

“oh, I see.” it was all she could respond, still wary of the news she had been waiting to tell. there was silence again until it’s broken by the question, “what about you, darling?” but for the sake of filling them in on the rest of her life, she talks about training on a good light. she doesn’t want them to worry as much as possible. she knew they were even when they didn’t say so. she talks about her friends too, all the people that took care of her in place of them other than herself. 

in the midst of them talking amongst each other, she thinks and chants to herself. how? how subtle could she be about it? she doesn’t budge straight away and she continues to talk of all the relevant people. finally, there’s a hint. over how close she was to a certain person. she thinks that this way, there was room for their feedback without its bias. then came the teasing which somehow relieves her. and this is how they think. father jumps right in to instigate and insistently get a name out of her. for a moment, she thinks of him as an owl with the hoots. she tries to whine her way out of the predicament but that wasn’t going to cut it, they all knew that. 

she shares a name at last. mother says, “what a pretty name!” now dad starts to fuss about and the questions come flooding. it brings about strings of nervous laughter from jennie and it only gets worse when they mention about a visit to korea. this is the time she panics, sending a text to her lover about the surprising news. it was brought up in the past but she knew with how busy they were, it wasn’t about to truly happen. six years is a long time. six years would have been forever to anyone else, even to her if she wasn’t occupied at all.

“oh yeah, show me who this punk is.” the playful words meant for sheer jest gets her sighing deeply. in cure, her mother pulls her spouse away from a one and one talk with her daughter.

the atmosphere becomes tense. she’d seen this coming so once in for all, she says it. “i’m dating him.” again, silence.

she tries to brush it off with one word but the anxiety was diminished as soon as a small laugh escapes her mother. encouraging words follow suit and she sighs out in relief. she keeps tight lipped about the topic regardless. she wasn’t sure if it was all out of consideration. her parents did that often and she’d feel bad. how can she have such wonderful figures in her life when she was lacking in every aspect? in exchange for such words, she’s giving a petulant complaint but it’s interrupted with the question if she wanted to inform her father as well. she easily nods, albeit slowly, but then she asks, “you think it’s okay?” which gets her a short answer of ‘sure’.

how is that supposed to help? she waits anxiously and when he comes into view, she gets a mini heart attack. silence, for the nth time. she takes her time with the news whilst her dad gives her an impatient, “yes?”

she hated having to repeat herself. she gets this from who else but her own father but whenever someone was more than her, surpassing her, she would have to go down a level. compromise, compromise. and so she says it.

silence. an endless essence of the event.

she was developing boldness at this point amidst his fussing so she expresses herself. “i want you to meet him.” he doesn’t stop there, however. he goes on and on, talking about thunder and lightning, bringing a bat, so on and so forth. she whines once again, then she talks sweet. there was a charm to whenever she did it because it somehow worked in her favor. it never fails to. there were no exceptions to this. it worked on everyone she knew. or most.

“when we get there… this summer.”

it’s excitement rather than anxiety now and it’s tenfold with how accepting they were of the news she thought would give them shock coupled with anger more than anything. she shares this news to the person in account. she’s already celebrating it, thinking through the things that could be done while her parents were lecturing her which comes in one ear and out the other. she says ‘okay’ to the ones that she’d caught, breaking reverie to take note of the reminders they were giving. she keeps those at least, as they were important and she simply agrees to everything.

the clock read 3:24 on monday morning. 6:24 in new zealand. it took them about two hours which satisfies her. it has been a while, it only served right to take that long. she ends the call with another greeting and reminders of her own as well.

with three lines of the three words, they hang up. she stays on the line listening to the feedback; her features that were tired from the day remained embellished with an evident grin.

that wasn’t so bad, after all.